Don't compare yourself to others.

 I have been feeling pretty good about Spanish. 

I love doing Pimsluer everyday while I walk, cook or clean the house.

My confidence is growing because I see that I know how to say quite a lot, I think my pronunciation is good and my listening and speaking skills are getting stronger.

It is very motivating.

And then...

Yesterday, I made a new friend named Beth who lives in Cleveland.

We spent 4 hours together doing volunteer work but talking the whole time.

I asked her if she knows any foreign language. Well, she is quite fluent in French. She started when she was in 4th grade (about 9 / 10 years old). She studied all through school and beyond. She has been throughout France multiple times and Canada. 

Sigh.

I did the very thing that my students do that I know is just not productive. 

I compared myself to her - and got discouraged.

I often struggle with a few things:

Feeling like I simply did not get as many opportunities in life as others have.

Regretting not taking a language in high school when I had the chance. 

I wanted to! But, I did not because - as one of the top students I was placed in "honors courses" which is just a term for - more work, more time. I simply had no room on my schedule for a language. And so it went for me. 

She is the first American I have ever met who started learning a language in school that young. 

It is simply not available. 

Some people have bilingual parents, or friends from other countries and pick it up. I never had that. 

So, today, I feel down, discouraged and tired (there is more to it). However, I do not want to waste any energy on this. It is not productive - and it certainly won't help me at all. I don't want to do things that are not productive, even harmful. 

So, no more feeling crappy about this.